sudden gush of ideas

yes, this is the last day of the year 2010 and right now, looking at the right side of my blog, i realize how long i've been here... how long i've kept this site and made it as a friend.

2010 has been a very nice year for me and i thank God for all the good things and good people that and who have occurred into my life. 2011 is a great year as well and i am praying and hoping for the best and for God's will.

many things will happen and i am excited to open the gifts that God has in store for me.

since i have placed the title as such, i believe that i should begin the flow of these thoughts that are in my head.

--
i will blog more often.

this has always been the case. but of course, i don't always have the time to do it. or perhaps just the mere willingness to type in the things that i am thinking. first is maybe it's because i am sometimes afraid that people (if ever there are actually people still visiting this...) would judge me based on whatever i will write around here. let's admit it. or rather i admit it. i always feel the urge to blog when i feel something negative or to plainly say it, when i am sad... and since i always remember what my eee13 teacher told us before, "Why would you give other people the reason to mock you?" i don't blog. i simply let the feeling pass away because i know, sooner or later, it will fade away.

when i am happy, i am just too 'tamad' to blog that's why my entries are so incomplete. haha. lame excuse.

i've been planning to change the layout of this site but i guess i still don't have much time.

i'll get there.

i specially need to change my picture here.

--
you should not do things half-heartedly.
why?
because it's even more difficult to succeed.
and by pushing yourself to do things which you don't really like in the first place, you lose your self value. and that's not good.

--
confidence.

i have always wanted myself to be much girly. in the sense that i can wear girly clothes.
i envy girls who can walk around wearing cute dresses because i don't wear those types of clothes. i can wear them but i don't. what's the problem?

me. and my confidence level.

whoever said that even a little confidence goes a long way must be so right.

i have confidence. but i don't have that kind of confidence. yet.

let's see.

--
death.

death is sad. and seeing the people who are close to you... actual people in your life lose someone special is just heartbreaking.

may you all rest in peace.

--
God.

having the opportunity to serve God in your youth should be a very good advantage.

i am getting older and i am little by little, consuming the days of my youth.

i should serve God. now.

---------------------------------

today (December 31) is one of the busiest days in our home.
it's New Year's Eve and it's also the birthday of my Lola! :D

it has been a tradition especially before when our Lola was still living with us that we cook food and have a noisy and happy house. Parang reunion sa Mother's side. :)

--

so there, i just hope for everyone's safety,
nakakangawit yung pwesto ko habang nagbblog.

--

i am re-reading The Alchemist right now.

Good Years ahead! :)

Love,
Clarence

even if

it's solitary... and so, i need to.

Even if...
You mean the whole damn world to me
I can forget you, wait and see
I can be strong even without you
I can't waste my life forever
Hoping you'd come back to me


God, please help me.
I'm surrendering everything to You now.

Also,
please help us have a safe trip tomorrow. :)

Thank you =D
Your will be done. :)

i'm a masochist

period. end.


sidenote:
i think miss ko si papa.
wala lang. yung feeling na safe kami dito sa bahay kasi andito siya. yung feeling na secured kami. ayun. at wala lang. parang mas may life pag andito siya. owell. oks lang Lord. happy rin naman eh.


nasasad ako ngayon. dapat di ko na lang binuksan ang folder na yun. pero kelangan ko yun. to stay on my mind.

miss you like crazy

blog's title due to my LSS. haha. it's better to be clear ya know.

hm, a thought occurred to me.
"it's better to wait and find that everything was worth the wait than to delight in the moment and find out later on that nothing was really ever worth it."

wala lang. hahhaah.

anyway, nasira yung mood ko for blogging dahil dun sa napanood kong bata sa Pilipinas Got Talent! so cute nung bata and so galing :D hehe.

i promised myself that i'll become a better person, yung mas magaling na person na maraming nagagawa. i think i need to stick to that :D that means i need to cut less of my chat moments and social networking site moments :P

hm, gusto ko magkaron ng eat all you can moment sa isang sosyal na hotel! kaso ang mahal eh. mga 1500 plus. hahaha :)) hm, sa case ko, totoo bang "the way to my heart is through my stomach?" hm, ako, hindi ako naniniwala dun... hahahah. :P pero pwede rin. hahahah. pero paranoid ako. so ayaw ko ng binibigyan ako ng food na inabot lang sakin tas di ko nakita san galing. hahaha paranoid ako na baka may something dun :P ahah. LOL.

anyway, kelangan ko na gumawa ng labrep :P

if seeing is believing, it’s worth the wait
so hold on and tell me it’s not too late
we’re so good together

hm, i want to be happy. but i don't want a happiness that has a consequence. who wants that right? so i'll stay put... and just be a good student and person, for now.

p.s. currently loving silent sanctuary. ahah, though wala pa akong copy nung album nila na Mistaken for Granted :P

Vday.

this day made me realize how last year was so so so so so so extremely so different from this year. point well taken i guess. ^^,

hm, i watched Percy Jackson with Jeff today. i enjoyed it primarily because i enjoy Greek Mythology :D i always forget who the gods are but i love their story. hahahaah. wala lang.

i and my family had our picture taken at the studio today. it was nice. matagal na rin yung last fam pic namin. obvious na obvious yung differences sa itsura lalo na dun sa 2 kong kapatid na lalaki. jeff's starting to have small pimples already. hahaha. i love his skin dati kasi suuuper as in mega kinis but babalik din naman yun i guess :) as for me, i think i became prettier!! hurray! hahaah. fighting spirit <3 hm, all in all i think, Vday was fun. i spent it with family and it was nice.

hm. i'm really trying to drive away sad thoughts at this moment because i can not find it in my heart to feel sad. i am happy. really. hahaah but honestly, i'm quite tempted to ask on how his day went. masochist me, hello?. =p nah. things are so different now. and honestly, my fave pic of ours was taken on feb13. nah nah nah nah nah. tama na to. hahahaahah.

masaya ako ngayon. dahil sa magagandang bagay na meron sa buhay. ayown :D hehe :0

last night, i was thinking if i should open my heart. si God na bahala. but this time, i must take things in a better way. better than last time. though sa tingin ko naman, maganda naman pagkahandle ko last time ah? haha LOL.

i'm eating cake while typing this blog entry.
I JUST LOVE FOOD.

food, you're my valentine.
i love you food.

oh noes.
GLUTTONY. @.@
haahhahaah kidding aside, don't you just love food?? :P

hm, ece 113 line up for the night!

God bless you Lence :D

Rakestra

i attended the fair last night.
wala pa rin ako tulog since i left edson's place pero ayun, keri lang?
masaya naman.
pero antok na antok pa rin ako.
hahhaahh!
this is not good for my skin, yung pagpupuyat :P

i have so many acads works to do pala :))
pero ayun, God blesses me :D

may John Mayer concert sa May15!
dapat mapanood ko yun. as in. wala lang :D hahahha.
i love JOhn Mayer! :)


hm......
Valentine's Day bukas.
tapos na. ayun.


honestly, i'm not yet prepared to re-open my heart to anyone.
i know i can miss out on certain people who can be willing to let me see that love is always worth a try..... i don't know. i let God lead my life. it feels that there are right people in the wrong time or maybe i am in the wrong phase of my life. or i am not sure. i need to be in control. hahaahahaah. basta. it's just that as of now, i don't want to feel a romantic inclination towards anyone. kasi choice ko yun. i don't want to be unfair to anyone and ayun. ewan. hahaha. nagfeefeeling lang ako na meron akong lovelife. hahahhaha :)) kasi Vday na bukas. :))


who would have thought that i'll end up like this on Vday. well,i'm choosing to not celebrate it with anyone naman. i think. LOL. hahah :))

pero honestly, i am happy.
and i thank God for this happiness =)

recently, yung mga meetings namin sa Yu Sung foundation ay incorporated dun sa Catholic Life Series ng Catholic Youth in Action :) sooper like ko yung evwnt kasi i feel God and i learn a lot and i am reminded of a lot of things :D tas we get to be a member din after! YEY :D

i thank God for everything right now.
i feel that my life is again in order and it's all because of HIM :)


right now, i just need to sustain this positive feeling and do my tasks.
as of this moment or night. i need to do my
--ece 113 lab dp
--ece 113 labrep
--ece 117 signal conditioning circuit
--GL tasks.

p.s. i want to download all the sings of Silent Sanctuary :D cool eh. hahaha. :P

yes, i am indeed EXCITED:))

woot, wee:)) wee is becoming my favorite expression these past few days, haha, although i remember that before, i really don't like the word. things really change, or should i say situations change!

wahahaha, i can't attempt to sleep although tomorow, i'll be going to Intramuros together with my householdmates in YFC. i have joined this org just last semester and although i have attended our household just once, i appreciate the bonding that we have because when people gather for God, things just seem so so so so easier. yah really! i had attended a lot of youth slash religious conventions and being friends with people whom you don't intially know can be as easy as snapping your finger. they're real nice. well you also have to be nice. oh may i add? sincerely nice, that is!:))

actually, i am just excited in seeing my blog... i am really happy regarding this stuff. i am glad that i have finally started. and so and so, i'm gonna share some happenings in my life today! hahah :))

wee:))

so i woke up about 8:30 am! thanks to my mama's alarm! ooh, i hated it! supposedly, that alarm did not sound so loud and alarming, nice term, i could have woke up at around 10 am! oh well, i jus twatched myx, yehey!!! i had the time to watch tv! then i watched more tv. i went at the mall and ate lunch with my parents. i can't remember the last time we did that! yah, it's just right now that i appeciate that moment..... thanks to blogging. hm, and then we, yes the three of us, atched i've fallen for you! haha, cornnny! my papa even wanted to watch rogue assassin all by himelf but i insisted that we watch the movie altogether. i know, my mama likes that movie too. then then, we fetch mybrother from school, my parents went to my grandfather's and my brother and i went home. i watched The Devil WearsPrada, read a magazine, texted my friends, ooh yeh, i have a load now, it's been like three weeks without cellphone credits!, and then more tv and internet. ooohlalalalla, vacation time, i love you! heheheh, wee:)) looks like i am enjoying myself too much, i need to sleep. i am planning to give my reviews about the movies i have watched! and oh, i am also currently reading some novels of Nicholas Sparks, i love them. although doing so stresses the point that i have no romantic thingies right now! hahah :))

and now, i am chatting with my friend who happens to have love issues, well, his issues about his love, i'm not included in the story, and ooh, i'm sleepy. good night for now!:))