when my patience is put to the limit

patience is a virtue.
everyone knows this fact.

a dull saturday morning.
i decided not to go to our org's outreach primarily because i would like to take a rest. besides, i need to go to my dentist because it was two months ago when my braces were last adjusted.

i went out of the house at around 12:30 due to my mother's demand.
i arrived at the clinic at around 12:45. alas. the dentist will be available at 2pm!

binary decision.
will i wait and stay or will i go out and return later?
i decided to do the latter.

i returnedat around 4pm!
alas again, the dentist is already unavailable...

do you experience that kind of feeling?
you are tempted to feel irritated but you settle to feel nothing.
you are tempted to sigh and to moan and to complain yet you choose to accpet the fact taht you have made a wrong decision.

my mother was mad at me.
she said that i don't realize the value of money since the cost of that unowrthy trip wzs 120pesos! daig ko pa ang nagpunta ng Maynila.....

kainis. ang sira ko talaga.

am i that impatient that i can't wait for about an hour without anything to do??
hm, i don't really like the feeling of sitting somewhere when i know that i could have been somewhere better but i guess i should learn that sometimes, i need to concede to the fact that there are better choices and mostly, those transpire when you decide to stay where you are and let patience prevail.

before i arrived at four pm there, i told myself that i will wait for her... that i will stay and WAIT. but alas, the moment i decided to stay and WAIT was the same moment that she is already gone. RAR. when will be the right time to wait?

RAR. matalino naman ako... bakit sa mga ganitong pagkakataon parang ang ewan ewan ng mga desisyon ko? ayoko namang lalong isipin na "sana nagoutreach na lang ako"

this is another blog entry of my raaaannntssss...
kailan kaya ako magbblog ng masaya?
but honestly, when i am not sad, i don't feel anything.

though i know, ideally, i need to feel happy.
it's because there are lots of things that i should be happy about.
but can i blame myself if sometimes the mood of sadness just dawns on me like a curtain that is not willing to be touched by the wind?
or am i just thinking too hard?
o baka naman aspeting <3 lang ito? lovelife? huh?

hm, ang alam ko, maraming rason para sumaya.
at oo nga, tama naman. piliin mong sumaya.

may nagsabi sa akin,
kung gusto mong sumaya, magpasaya ka ng iba.
ang galing di ba?
hm, sinu naman kaya ang mapapasaya ko?
hahaha.

hm, patience is a virtue.
it pays to be patient......